WHORE WARS

by Jean Roberta

Carol Queen, a colorful bisexual sex performer and "sex-positive" feminist in San Francisco, has written a widely-read collection of esays, REAL LIVE NUDE GIRL (Cleis Press, 1997). In this book, she defines three stigmatized categories of women: dykes, sluts and whores. She also points out that whores (or sex workers) include many males, while dykes are analogous to fags, or gay men." As a feminist, Queen argues against oppression in general, including the "horizontal hostility" between categories of "sexual deviants." She also argues for the acceptance of consensual sex in all forms.

Canadian anti-porn lesbian-feminist Susan Cole has put together her own collection of essays, POWER SURGE:"SEX, VIOLENCE AND PORNOGRAPHY (Second Story Press, 1995)." This book includes pieces written from the early 1980s to the mid-1990s, and Cole claims that all are still valid.

She remarks: "With the possible exception of the one on pornography, the prostitution debate within the feminist movement has been one of the most bitter any of us had ever experienced. . . at the so-called feminist conference on prostitution called Challenging Our Images in Toronto [in 1986] feminists like myself who were trying to say that prostitution was an institution of male dominance were confronted by sex workers who had decided that anti-pornography feminists were to blame for everything:" bad laws, social stigmatization, the madonna/whore syndrome -- just about every factor in prostitutes' real oppression."

Although she was clearly still shaken by the shouting match at the time she wrote these words, Cole tried to summarize the prostitutes' argument:

"Tired of being classed as victims only, organized sex workers don't want to be singled out in the continuum of women's experience." They now openly question whether there's much real difference between the prostitute/client relationship and the relationship between husband and wife -- except that prostitutes are more open about the exchange rate."They suggest that, given the range of choices, and the amount of money to be made, prostitution might be a fair choice. Feminists, they say, are just uptight because the commodity marketed is sex."

In the next paragraph, Cole makes a distinction between "sex workers" (presumably including everyone who has ever sold sex) and "radical feminists":

". . . when sex workers say that they experience tricking as 'just another gig,' or 'no worse than being a secretary,' or 'a job I want to do but in safety,' there isn't a lot we [radical feminists] can say."For what do we know?" We have never been there. . . if a fundamental

principle of radical feminists is to believe women and what they say, we have no way to respond to sex workers who just want to be left to do their work in peace and safety."

Cole seems to be making an effort to practice her principles."By Queen's standards, though, her prejudice is clear."If Cole sees "sex workers" as very different animals from "feminists" (radical or moderate), why doesn't she see the same culture gap between "dykes" and "feminists"?"Or even between "sluts" (those who enjoy sex outside of monogamous relationships intended to last a lifetime) and "feminists"?

What Cole's assertions show is that she herself has never sold sex for cash, and she assumes that none of her buddies have either."Apparently no sex workers (past or present) have trusted Cole enough to tell her about their adventures in the skin trade."I wonder why not.

Carol Queen explains the ignorance of those who express good intentions toward sex workers:

"Whore stigma is stronger than lesbian stigma today not only because prostitution remains more universally criminalized than lesbianism, but also because so many sex workers remain in the closet, hiding from friends' and families' reactions and often cut off even from other whores, their first logical source of support."Because the average person thinks s/he does not know any prostitutes, sex workers remain marginalized and mythologized and find it harder to break through the wall of stereotypes that separate them from others. When whores DO come out and talk -- publicly, or privately with selected friends -- their accounts of their feelings and experiences are frequently denied because they don't mesh with people's preconceived ideas about prostitution." They are accused of being in denial about how damaging their lifestyle is."

Queen goes on to draw a political parallel: "If this scenario sounds familiar, it should."Replace all references to sex workers in the previous paragraph with "lesbian" [or "gay male"] and you have a description of the pre-Gay Liberation dyke's [or fag's] plight, a situation that was radically changed through the consciousness-raising, agitation and support of queer identity politics."

Even now, however, homophobic conservatives can find "reformed homosexuals" who are willing to trash their former community and confess "how damaging" a gay/lesbian lifestyle is. We have all experienced pain."Some of us have been harmed by ex-lovers and "friends" as well as by the homophobic majority that surrounds us."Most of us would like to see some improvements in our community of choice, but we would resent being told that our love and sense of kinship with others like ourselves show that we are "in denial" about our own experience."We also tend to distrust assumptions about who can speak for a diverse community.

Susan Cole approaches the exotic territory of sex work in a way that she would probably resent if she were on the receiving end."She describes a "magic moment" in the 1986 conference when an ex-prostitute challenged a current prostitute by saying: "Don't tell me that every time you give some guy a blow job you get off on it."

The other woman responded, "Well, not every time.""Cole interpreted this comment as support for the position of WHISPER (Women Hurt in Systems of Prostitution Engaged in Revolt), an organization of ex-prostitutes which disputes the analysis of prostitutes' rights groups.

Susan Cole quotes Sarah Wynter, a member of WHISPER: "We started to organize because the cultural mythology didn't reflect the reality of our lives. . . I'm referring to the line that prostitution is a free choice; that it can be decontextualized from the patriarchal society we live in; that it can be fixed by unionizing it, legalizing,

decriminalizing it; that the relation between a pimp and a prostitute is a love relationship; that prostitutes are on the cutting edge of women's sexual liberation and that prostitutes control tricks and the rate of pay."Johns don't pay you so you get sexual pleasure."They pay you to use your body. I think it's a mistake to validate it."

"Validate," now there is a loaded word."If Wynter doesn't think that unions and legalization help sex workers enough, does she believe that a LACK of legal protection helps them?"If WHISPER and its feminist allies refuse to "validate" prostitution, do they think it will go away? Regarding the "patriarchal" nature of sex work, no job in a patriarchal society can be "decontextualized."" Regarding the relation between a pimp and a prostitute, managers and their clients rarely love each other either, although they might well co-operate to further their mutual interests. Exploitation, to greater and lesser degrees, is in the nature of capitalism.

I assume that the founders of WHISPER are brave and honest survivors of abuse."I am concerned, however, about their policies."Do they support police harassment of everyone involved in the sex trade?"If so, what good do they think this does?"And if they are opposed to an exchange of sex

for money or material support, are they educating the public about marriage as a patriarchal institution in which women are often abused?"Are they, like Carol Queen, concerned about the welfare of male and transgendered sex workers?

The association of force and violence with sex work and even with "porn," the visual and verbal representation of sex, is not just an expression of feminist paranoia."As long as sex work is stigmatized and criminalized in a social context of inequality, it is likely to take some nasty forms.

On the other hand, every stigmatized form of sex has been assumed to involve violence."Same-sex encounters are described by homophobic voyeurs as:" 1) the corruption of innocent youth (through force or deception), or 2) the traumatic "feminization" of men in prison through gang rape, or 3) the forced recruitment of "normal" women into an Amazon army of male-bashers. Do these scenarios reflect your experience?

As Carol Queen points out, "whorephobia" is still flourishing among feminists as well as in "the patriarchy."It flourishes in the gay/lesbian/bisexual/transgendered community, and it weakens community spirit."Ignorance and disapproval do nothing to make anyone safer.

My own unproven guess about the largely-invisible community of past and present sex workers among us is that more gay men and male-to-female transsexuals than lesbians have sold sex."This is hard to verify, since there is no accurate way to survey the "closeted.""The ratio of male to female whores might have to do with the different ways that females and males are brought up, and with different types of stigma.

Gay male sex workers (or "sluts") are often assumed to be HIV-positive, and "whorephobia" overlaps with AIDS phobia. "Dyke whores," as Carol Queen terms them, are especially stigmatized for selling sex to men who are usually straight, white and privileged, since these are the people who can afford to pay for sex and are socially allowed to do it. (Please note that most "johns" come from the same social class as the cops and politicians who claim to support "feminist" demands to wipe out prostitution.)

I have often been amazed at the level of ignorance about sex work which coexists with the trade itself."It is happening under your nose, here and now. Even if you have never turned a trick yourself, someone you know probably has. Their reasons for keeping their knowledge to themselves are obvious."If knowledge is not shared, however, ignorance persists.

My advice to non-whores who would like to bridge the gap: try not to assume anything. Some sex workers are survivors of childhood sexual abuse, and some are not."Some are addicted to everything available, and some are absolutely clean and sober. Some have been abused by pimps, while some have been protected by pimps, who have a practical motive for keeping them alive and healthy. Many female sex workers have children to support, so "motherhood" and "prostitution" are no more contradictory than "feminism" and "prostitution." Most of those who are currently working are at least as worried about being arrested and/or losing an income as they are about picking up Jack the Ripper, so please don't suggest that a police "crackdown" would protect them from further harm. Think twice before saying:" "But you don't seem like the type." (As if you, like Susan Cole, are so familiar with "the type.")

My advice to past and present sex workers who would like to break the silence: if you haven't harmed anyone, you don't owe anyone an apology. Make an effort to separate the things that work for you from the things that don't, and be clear about the difference. Remember that lies will mess up your mind faster than whatever substance you are tempted to use to deal with the lies." And most importantly, don't give up hope."Friends can be found in unexpected places.