By Myriam
Copyright 2000

Many of us without realizing it have created connections with others through various sexual encounters that are not healthy or productive to our continued spiritual growth.

Each intimate encounter with another person creates a harmonic or resonance on many different levels -- the auras connect, the souls connect, the spirit connects as the body and mind connect. Many of these encounters are wonderful and are to be cherished but others can be destructive and can have an impact that follows us from the moment of encounter till we die and even into the next life if we do not cleanse our energy fields of this connection. Your passion can create your prison but there is a key to release you.

Ritual Meaning and Definition

First, let us define ritual. A ritual is a structured set of behaviors that helps to communicate intent to the unconscious (both collective and individual) from the conscious mind. A ritual does not have to be elaborate but it can be if that helps you as an individual find greater meaning and response to the metaphor you are evoking.

Evoking metaphor is a very important component of ritual. To be effective you must understand that metaphor in ritual is more than acting like something it is being something. For example, in the Catholic ritual of Communion one does not act like one is drinking the blood of Christ and eating the body of Christ -- one through metaphor of ritual actually experiences the transcendent power of pure communion of spirit by transforming through ritual the wonder of mystic marriage with the divine by taking in the host into one's being. In all effective ritual one goes from acting out a metaphor and transcends to being the metaphor.

If you first participate in ritual and do not experience connection with the divine -- oneness with the metaphor -- do not be discouraged. Practice develops skill and confidence. Skill and confidence create belief. Belief creates transformation and transmutation. Your epiphany will manifest if you are persistent and dedicated to developing your skills of ritual to achieve your goals.

A Simple Ritual

These are a few simple steps that you can use to create your ritual for cleansing. You can adapt these steps to any other ritual in achieving an objective of transformation using metaphor invocation.

One. Create an atmosphere that is sensually evocative. Doing ritual in the middle of the basement with a clutter of boxes and dirty laundry will make your objective of connection and transcendence much more difficult. Thus it is important to create a sacred space in your home that you use primarily for ritual. If you are going to work with sexual ritual, which I assume that you are since you are reading this essay, it would be wonderful to make your sacred space your bedroom. If you have a spare bedroom that could be your temple manifestation that would even be more wonderful. Imagine inviting your partner into your Temple of Love.

Creating atmosphere requires involving as many senses as possible to create a body mind spirit connection. Lighting should be conducive to relaxation. Decoration should be conducive to a spiritual state. Aromatherapy techniques should be involved to create an increased sensitivity (This would include incense, perfumes, oils, preparatory baths before ritual, scented candles and so forth). Many people forget sound as a sensory organ (and a great sex organ). Muffle out signs from the outside with heavy drapery or insulation and invest in a good sound system to play tapes and CD's. Choose music that vibes to your energy level. (In a future article I will deal with sound therapy and using music for transcendence.) Touch is another important sense to address. Choose fabrics and carpeting that feels good to you.

If you like crisp cottons that smell of the springtime than choose that but if you like rich silks, satins and velvets choose those. The important thing is to involve the sense of touch in the experience. This also includes what you wear during ritual. For some this would mean being sky clad (naked) for others it would be to wear a ritual robe or clothing that delights the senses. The issue here is that ritual will work better the more senses that you involve in the inner-outer communication process of ritual.

Two. Intent. You cannot do a ritual if you don't know what your objective message is during the ritual. The reason the sacrament works in the traditional churches is that there is consensus over time as to what the intent of the ritual is based upon the scripting of the repeated ritual. Decide and plan your ritual and write out your intent for the ritual. A ritual must become repetitive to work so create a journal for ritual work. You may call it what every you want . . . I call my sexual journal my Pillow Book from the Chinese movie. Keep a diary of your rituals, your intent, your decor, your response after the ritual.

Three. Fake it till you make it. Most of us feel uncomfortable when we first attempt self-designed ritual. The new is scary but it can also be exciting. Don't worry about making a fool out of yourself or looking silly. When you first start you will be the only one seeing your rituals. Later on you might invite a partner to participate or even a group but when you start out you are the only one judging you. (Be gentle with yourself when you record your reactions in your journal.) Do not expect your first attempts to reflect the great rituals of Venus but given time and keeping at it you will create the energy of a pantheon of Gods and Goddesses.

Four. Sacrifice. The word sacrifice means to make sacred. A strong part of sexual ritual is the art of sacrifice. You create a message that you sanctify and make sacred in a message to your gods . . . be they god, goddess, muse, higher power or higher consciousness. As you create your ritual keep in mind that you are making sacred all that you do and thus all ritual is sacrifice of disbelief and fear.

A Ritual for Release of Past Negative Sexual Energy Connections

I am assuming that you have read and created the steps listed above from creating a sacred space to creating a journal to accepting the reason and value of ritual. Now it is time to put into action the cleansing.

Suggested Colors for Ritual: White for purity, Black for emptiness or void, Pink for Transcended love.

Suggested Music for Ritual: Gentle Love Songs that make you feel good. What was your first love song in high school? This would be a great choice.

Suggested Aroma: Clean and sweet smells that are reminders of innocence and love. Lilac, Lily of the Valley, Vanilla are all good choices. Even cinnamon would be good if your Mother used to cook with this when you were a child. A sort of Apple Pie comfort smell.

Suggested Candles: 1 White 1 Black 1 Pink

Suggested Affirmation or Prayer (write this down to use in your ritual)

I (your name) evoke the power of love and healing into my body, mind, spirit and soul. I call upon the innocent child within me to be brought forth in total safety and protection. I affirm my oneness with the universal spirit and know that all that I ask in this moment of love and healing will be manifest for the good of all concerned. I now call for and accept my spiritual sexual healing. All negative energy connections that have been created since the moment of my first sexual encounter are now cut and forever and ever transmuted to positive energy. All positive energy connections that I have been created since my first sexual encounter are now strengthened and blessed with even greater love and appreciation. From this moment forth, I express my sexuality as a manifestation of divine love and caring. I attract to me only those people (or that mate) who manifest this divine communion. I sacrifice and make sacred all negative fears concerning my sexuality and it's manifestation into this reality and release all to the divine consciousness to manifest my healing and continued growth as a loving and caring person.

Before you begin your ritual place the three new candles in a triangle with the white on the right point, the black on the left point, and the pink on the top point.

Choose an incense, which reflects this loving energy next to the candles.

Place a metal bowl filled with sand (or other burn safe material) in the center of the triangle.

If they are available I would suggest placing some new flowers (preferably in the bud state) to the right of the candles.

Place a copy of the above prayer/affirmation written on new pure white paper in front of the candles.

Start your music playing

Make sure that you have matches or a lighter available.

Draw a bath and cleanse yourself using pure water with no soap or essence at all. You are to be naturally clean like you were as a baby. You might choose to use castile soap or Ivory soap and when you are done dust yourself with baby powder. The important point is this cleansing is to make you feel new and fresh and clean as you were as a baby. It is good at this time to meditate and visualize yourself as a child at night being lovingly bathed and loved by the parent. (Even if you did not have this experience you can imagine it and evoke these feelings. If you do not have a bath available a shower will work just make sure to attend to the cleanliness and the visualizations that evoke memories (imagined or real) of a sweet loving innocent childhood.

Go to where you have placed your candles and other items. If you feel comfortable with it approach the ritual naked if not dress yourself in something simple and pure and made of natural fibers. A white terry robe that is freshly laundered would be wonderful for this ritual.

Light your incense.

Light your candles. Start with the white candle and as you light it say: I affirm love and purity. Light the black candle and as you light if say: I affirm release and transmutation of all negative energy.

Read your prayer (affirmation) out loud and with true sincerity. Listen to your voice and your words. Let images of light fill your being. Do this with the knowing that you are now healed. With the black candle light the paper on fire and place it in the fire-safe container. As it burns allow all of your senses to be filled with the experience. The smells. The sounds. The sights. The feelings.

After the paper is completely burned, take the black candle and the white candle and using them both as representation of your dark side and your light side light the pink candle and visualize yourself surrounded by pure love in the image of a light of sweet pure pink surrounding you. Place the white candle and the black candle back in their holders.

Allow yourself to savor the moment until you feel comfortable and that it is time to finish your ritual.

To finish your ritual, Affirm this out loud: All that I speak, think, say and desire from this experience is now manifest for the good of all concerned. Blow out your candles.

Wrap up the candles in a white cloth and put them away in a safe place. You may use them again if you need to cleanse yourself. It is a good idea to only use these specific candles for the same type of ritual unless you cleanse them using ritual techniques.

Timing: This ritual would work well when initiated when the transiting moon was conjunct your natal Pluto or when there was a new moon in your 8th house.

You can cleanse yourself of all negative energy with these techniques. Recapture your energy that you have given away to others through the use of ritual. I will be writing more later about energy recapture.

Visit Myriam get your love forecast at http://mylovesigns.com